“There is no light without shadow and no psychic wholeness without imperfection.”
- Carl Jung
The term ‘shadow work’ refers to the practice of working through and learning to forgive your shadow self. Your shadow self is the side of you that you tend to hide from others and keep out of sight, hence the name. The shadow is a psychological term for everything we can’t see in ourselves. The shadow is the “dark side” of our personality because it consists mostly of primitive, negative human emotions and impulses like rage, envy, greed, selfishness, desire, and the striving for power. Everything we deny in ourselves—whatever we perceive as inferior, evil, or unacceptable—becomes part of the shadow. Exploring your shadow can lead to greater authenticity, creativity, energy, and personal awakening. This reflective process is also helpful in reaching mature adulthood. Shadow work refers to discovering shadow traits, forgiving ourselves for them, healing from past trauma that may have caused them, and processing them in order to grow. Shadow traits are usually developed in childhood when we are most susceptible to soaking up the attitudes and energies of our environment coupled with trauma experienced that we are not yet equipped to deal with. Shadow work is the process of getting to know the parts of yourself that you’re not currently aware of (unconscious). All of the stuff we tucked away in our early development—the attributes, attitudes, and qualities incompatible with our self-identity—are brought back to the surface. The unconscious, disowned material is brought to bear on the conscious mind (consciousness).
The shadow is one of main archetypes that Swiss psychologist, Carl Jung, focused on. Jung’s shadow archetype is often likened to Sigmund Freud’s theory on the Id, (the primitive part of the psyche responsible for sexual and aggressive drives, as well as hidden memories.) In 1923, Freud theorised that the human psyche is comprised of three parts: the Id, the Ego, and the Superego. The Id according to Freud, was the Superego is the moral conscious, while the Ego acts as the go-between. Freud’s Id and Jung’s Shadow contrast in certain aspects because Jung believed that not all Shadow traits were inherently negative and could even result in creativity, while Freud believed that the Id was primitive and purely driven by instinct. According to Jung, our Shadow is the side of us that the ego doesn’t identify with; the ‘darker’ side of our personality. While the traits that make up our shadow, usually perceived to be negative (as our ego has hidden them for a reason) can also be positive, as having low self esteem or anxiety can cause us to unnecessarily reject certain aspects of ourselves that we’ve been taught are bad. An example would be that being extroverted and impulsive can also be part of the Shadow, but aren’t necessarily negative traits. Some of us as children are just taught that we should be quiet, calm, and rational and therefore view these as traits that we should push down and bury.
Shadow traits that one might possess include:
Anger/Outbursts of rage
Envious/Jealous
Manipulative/Exploitative
Selfish/Self-centred
Arrogant/Egotistical
Obsessed with appearance/how other people see them/dependent on praise
Judgemental
Defensive
Overly competitive
Stubborn
Shadow work can be really uncomfortable. You have to be vulnerable and honest with yourself, and that can be challenging and difficult especially as the shadow self has been hidden and suppressed for so long. Thinking about our upbringing, environment growing up, trauma, and parents’ impact on our entire being because of their own toxic traits is also a very humbling experience. You finally realise that the people who raised you are also human and also have their own shadow selves.
Eventually, the goal and reward is for you to learn to forgive yourself for your shadow traits, for you to come to realise why you have these less desirable attributes, come to accept the sides of yourself that you might have kept hidden in the past, and move into a much happier, more accepting frame of mind.
Shadow work is learning about ourselves, our own toxic traits and why they developed. It helps us learn who we are as people, grow, and reach a place of true self acceptance. Shadow work is in a sense free therapy and closely linked with connecting with your true or higher self. Shadow work is said to raise your vibrational frequency helping you to align with and attract better things and is an amazing act of self care.
There are many various ways that one can practice shadow work:
Journalling prompts
Noticing emotional reactions
Engaging in inner dialogue
Challenging conscious goodness
The 3-2-1 shadow process
Shadow meditation
Write it down
Embrace your creative side
Mirror technique
Communicate with your shadow side
Shadow affirmations
Practice acceptance and compassion
Loving kindness meditation
Shadow integration is the process of bringing these disowned parts of yourself back into consciousness and making them a part of you. Each disowned part, once integrated, makes you less fragmented. For example, let’s say you get angry when you see someone is lying. You think to yourself, “I would never lie like that.” After confronting this aspect of your shadow, you come to terms with the fact that you lie quite often, including lying to yourself. Now, when someone else lies, you notice it, but you don’t get angry anymore. Each step you take in integrating your shadow brings you closer to wholeness. And in the process, your personality changes and develops. Integrating your shadow, however, takes time. Patience is necessary. Shadow integration requires many confrontations with one’s ego. However, as each psychic tension gets resolved, you become more balanced and “okay” with yourself. Ultimately, integrating your shadow comes down to one primary thing: acceptance. In the absence of acceptance, we are left with resistance but through internal observation and the persistence of watching our patterns and triggers day by day, reality begins to settle in. As psychological maturity develops, you become “softer” and more understanding with yourself. Acceptance of what is becomes easier and more natural. The results bring more fluidity to one’s life. While “peeling layers of an onion” may be an overused metaphor, it is certainly apt when it comes to integrating the shadow. Although shadow integration isn’t an end in itself, by helping you dismantle the false self, it helps pave the way to bring you closer to the true self and possibly even heal generational trauma.
I am interested to hear anyone's thoughts on shadow work and their own journeys if anyone is willing to share or offer any additional insight, info or advice. I will follow up with a post soon on shadow work exercises if anyone is interested.
Hope everyone has a wonderful day