Hey emm...
Nice post. ... It sounds like you have been at this face r some time and that you have arrived to a nice place of deep acceptance both within and also that which is part of your external world.
I'm curious how long has this particular phase of your journey lasted? What is termed the Tf journey or what have you?
My awakening was 6 years ago... And really so much of what I've gone through would have been completely unfathomable to my former fearful self
I also had very chronic depression which lifted completely for about 18months at awakening. As my shadow work began to creep through I dealt with small bouts of depression here and there but it was a useful depression as a lot of it was me passing through my shadows and learning to love myself... I am such a strong person who has collapsed and rebuilt so many old patterns and I am very proud of my strength and determination to have arrived to where I am now...
Which is cool... But it is such a personal journey like you said... I think if I was to give my old version advice it would be to release expectations with the exception of expecting the unexpected haha.